Personal Growth

Assumptions Lead to Problems

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Last week I was preparing for Sunday’s service at church. We wanted to include communion as part of the service. I have only been at this church for a few weeks now, and I assumed things.

I assumed that their traditions around the celebration of communion would be similar to my experience. Here are my assumptions. I assumed that I could insert communion into the service where I felt it fit best. I was planning for a two-part sermon and decided communion would work really well as a practical expression of the first part. Next, I assumed that communion would be set up with cups of juice in trays and bread on plates. I assumed that would mean we needed a table at the front for the elements to sit until we were ready to move into the ceremony of communion. Then, I assumed that we would be serving everyone. That lead to a few more assumptions. I assumed we then needed to have 4 people prepared to pass the trays down the rows to cover the two sections of chairs we had set up, so I asked four of the elders if they could help serve. Along with the serving, I then assumed that since we were serving the bread and then the juice, we could use someone to play some music while everyone was being served, so I asked my wife to be prepared to play a few songs on the piano. Since I assumed we were serving everyone, I thought my sermon would be longer because we had to give time to serve everyone which would draw things out a bit.

My assumptions were not correct. First, in talking to my wife, she mentioned that she had seen a supply of cups and wafers that were one sealed unit. So then I assumed we will only be serving them once, so that shortens up the time a bit. Then, in conversation with one of the Elders, he mentioned that they had just been handing the elements to people as they entered the sanctuary.

So we will not be serving them at all, okay. They will already have the bread and juice with them for when they were needed. And that meant that we didn’t need anyone to actually serve the congregation.

Well, someone still had to hand them out as people came in for the service. Another assumption was that the piano could be used and I was informed it desperately needed tuning and was not ready to play. I had to tell my wife that her playing was not needed.

Assumptions.

We often make assumptions, especially when we are in a new situation. I am new to this church and had not bothered to ask anyone about how they practiced communion. I could have saved myself some trouble by just asking a few appropriate questions.

So, how can we deal with assumptions in new situations?

  • Realize we don’t know what we don’t know.

When we are in a new situation, we assume that we can approach it the same way we have approached similar situations in the past. We need to realize that every new situation requires new information for us to know how to proceed in a meaningful way.

  • Watch and listen

We can learn a lot in a new situation if we slow down and carefully observe what is going on. Before jumping into action, watch what others around you are doing, even how they are doing things. Listen to the conversation. What do they talk about? What can you learn from what they are saying that will help you know how to move ahead?

  • Ask questions

I am serving as a Transition Pastor. That means I go into a church for a period of a year or so before I move on to a new assignment. Every new church I serve is a new experience for me. Yes, I have years of experience being a pastor, but I have not been a pastor for this church at this time. Even in the last church I served, I had been a pastor there years ago, but people and practices had changed. I did not know how things were done now.

So, I ask a lot of questions. I want to know what their traditions are and how they would like to see things done. I try to figure out who they are talking about when they mention a name.

I try to get a sense of the inter-personal dynamics in the relationships of the people I am working with. I want to know the history so I can get a true sense of the present.

  • Admit you are a newbie

It’s okay to remind people that you are new here, acknowledge that this is a new situation and you may mess up. As I greet people on Sundays, I admit I am new there and don’t know if they are long-term members or guests. As we talk about programs or practices, I remind people I am new and don’t know all the history. I regularly ask people to give me some background and detail on programs or practices so I can get a sense of what they are talking about.

  • Ask for a guide

Sometimes it is helpful to ask for someone to be your guide. It’s good to find who is familiar with the situation so they can help you navigate around potential missteps. If you can find someone like this, make use of their knowledge.

Assumptions can lead to problems, but you may avoid those problems by trying some of the tips above.

I would love to hear how you have handled new situations. Leave a comment about how something went really well or really bad.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Book Reviews: Andy’s 2022 Reading Experience

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I will be sharing a brief review of every book I read this year. Hope you enjoy and hope it encourages you to keep reading.

DEFINED: Who God Says You Are – by Stephen Kendrick & Alex Kendrick

Many in our culture are struggling with their identity. They are confused about who they really are. The Kendrick brothers present a great answer by walking through “who God says you are.” They draw on the book of Ephesians as they say “His Word teaches that you can discover, believe, and set your heart on your true identity – your identity in heaven.” The book is laid out in a daily reading style with extra scriptures and a prayer at the end of each day’s reading. Want to know who God says you are? Then this book is for you.

Book Reviews: Andy’s 2022 Reading Experience

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I will be sharing a brief review of every book I read this year. Hope you enjoy and hope it encourages you to keep reading.

HOPE IN THE DARK – by Craig Groeschel

Hope in the Dark: Believing God is Good When Life is Not addresses those questions we have when life is not going as well as we think it should. Craig Groeschel asks many of the questions that we have all asked from time to time, questions like: “Where are you God?” and “Why aren’t you doing something?” He draws on the book of Habakkuk where the prophet asks some of the same questions. Let me give you one quote that I thought was very helpful. He writes, “Habakkuk urges us to draw on our long-term memories of God rather than being so shortsighted that we choose to keep replaying only our immediate, distressing circumstances.” That is so good! As we take our eyes off of our present situation we can remind ourselves of God’s goodness in the past and know that that same God is still walking with us in the difficulties we face. This is a very encouraging book for anyone asking the questions about where God is in our pain.

Do You Really See Your Team?

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We are quick to make judgements about people. Our first impressions can be completely wrong but we hold onto them anyway. Other times, the we may have known someone for a long time but do not realize they are not the same person they were years ago. For someone in a leadership role, there is a particular danger of viewing people one way and not realizing who they truly are and how they can be of help in our organization.

King Solomon, in Ecclesiastes, describes some of the unfortunate ways that people see others.

13 Here is another bit of wisdom that has impressed me as I have watched the way our world works. 14 There was a small town with only a few people, and a great king came with his army and besieged it. 15 A poor, wise man knew how to save the town, and so it was rescued. But afterward no one thought to thank him. 16 So even though wisdom is better than strength, those who are wise will be despised if they are poor. What they say will not be appreciated for long. (Ecclesiastes 9: 13-16, NLT)

These people greatly benefited from the wisdom of a poor person. They appreciated the rescue but did not appreciate the person. We are like these townspeople: quick to write people off, even if they have valuable gifts and insights. We see them a certain way and do not allow that to change as we begin to get to know them and what they offer.

Because of this oversight, we – and by extension our teams and organizations – may lose out on valuable skills and insight just because we have identified a person in one way so we do not think they have anything to add.

King Solomon continues:

5 There is another evil I have seen under the sun. Kings and rulers make a grave mistake 6 when they give great authority to foolish people and low positions to people of proven worth. 7 I have even seen servants riding horseback like princes—and princes walking like servants! (Ecclesiastes 10: 5-7, NLT)

Our quick judgements can create further damage when we choose to promote or demote the wrong people. This can be due to existing relationships or the desire to honour certain people. The unfortunate result is that we listen to the advice of the wrong person when there is someone much wiser nearby.

Most of us work with teams and volunteers in some way at some point in our life. This is especially true in ministry, when programs and services rely on staff and volunteers.

Get to know these staff and volunteers. This could be through personality tests, or at a minimum, putting in the effort to get to know each person well enough to see how they can contribute best. Intentionally take time with this in order to avoid making quick assumptions or writing someone off because of one or two missteps. Often the best outcome happens when people are in roles that suit them best, and it often takes time to identify these roles and responsibilities.

As you work with your teams and notice people are in the wrong roles, be brave enough to reorganize and reassign individuals to roles where they will excel and your team will be better in the long run.

I love to get things done, but I have realized that there are times where I am better off taking time to get to know people first. As we get to know each other, I will learn where someone can serve and give their best, and we will be able to communicate better because I know them and they know me.

Good organizations will have a regular system of evaluating people. The leader does a formal review every six months or a year to continue to help the person get better. In the evaluation, the leader can also discern if this person is still a fit here or would fit better in a different role. A system of regular evaluation is good, but the personal relationships are even better. As you develop good relationships with your key people, they will be brave enough to approach you when they want to learn or grow in a certain area or if they would like to try a different role. If open communication is valued and practiced, you will be more likely to continually give the right responsibilities to the right people.

So much of what we do in life involves working with people. Let’s figure out how to help our teams be the best by putting the right people in the right seats where everyone can contribute their best.

Get to know your people first, then get the work done.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

9 Reasons To Not Quit Today

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Have you heard about the “Great Resignation?” Many people are quitting their jobs. So many in the recent months that it has been given the name: the Great Resignation. While this trend mainly focuses on the private sector, it has been felt within the churches, too. There are many churches currently hiring pastors because pastors have quit and are not in a hurry to take on another pastoral position.

I would like to give you nine reasons not to quit today.

1. You have been called by God.

If you are a pastor, you have been called to this role. Do not let the frustrations of covid and the hard work of ministry make you leave your calling.

2. Your church needs you.

No matter how long you have walked with your congregation, you know them better than any other pastor. They know you better than any other pastor. They may be walking through similar frustrations in life and need someone like you to remind them that God is walking with them, just as he is with you.

3. Your community needs you.

I hope you have invested in your community to the point that people know you and you know the people. They need someone like you to introduce them to Jesus. They need you to lead your congregation to continue to pour God’s love into the community. The new pastor does not have the relationships you have already built in the community.

4. The grass is not greener elsewhere.

If you were to leave your church and go to another one, you will most likely encounter people with many of the same life issues and problems. People are the same everywhere.

5. There are people watching you.

If you are a leader, you are being watched by others. They are looking to you to see how you handle the frustrations of life. You can show them how to persevere through difficult times. You can show them how to find encouragement from others.

6. Your present pain may be future gain.

It is often in the painful moments of life that our faith in God deepens and our relationship with God matures. The hard times offer us forks in the road of life. Will you choose the path to a deeper relationship with God or the path that gives you an easier life?

7. A sabbatical may be the answer.

There are times when we do need a break, a time for rest and recovery. In the same way that our body needs rest after a hard day’s work, there are times we need to have a break from the hectic pace of life. Don’t quit, but ask for a sabbatical to rejuvenate for the next part of your journey with your church.

8. Take advantage of help that is available.

Too often leaders try to lead alone. Pastors, don’t be a Lone Ranger. If you are part of a denomination, there is likely support available. There may be other pastors who are willing to walk the journey with you. Maybe you could seek out some encouragers you trust. Find a counselor who can help you find tools to manage the emotions of your ministry.

9. Spend time with God.

Even if you can’t take a sabbatical, take some time every day to pour your heart out to God. Ask him for insight and wisdom to lead well. Read the Bible and hear from God. Read about other leaders in the Bible who struggled and kept on going. Spend time in the Psalms, and Laments, and ask God to help you join in with the writers who declare that they will trust in God no matter what.

Keep looking up, and keep on going,

Andy Wiebe

P.S. Watch for next week’s article on reasons TO quit.

Book Reviews: Andy’s Reading Experience 2022

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I will be sharing a brief review of every book I read this year. Hope you enjoy and hope it encourages you to keep reading.

DEEP FAITH – by Dr. Rob Reimer

Rob Reimer has written another great book regarding personal renewal and spiritual growth. In Deep Faith, he helps the reader see how they may deepen or grow their faith. Reimer does a good job of showing how this has worked in his own life and his experience with others. He says on page, “Faith is not static; it is dynamic. We can and must take an intentional path toward growing and developing our faith if we want to see the works of the Kingdom in greater measure, for the glory of the King, and for the sake of his mission to the world.” He wants to help people grow in their faith for the glory of God and for the continuing growth of the kingdom. A great read if you want to deepen your faith.

Book Reviews: Andy’s Reading Experience 2022

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I will be sharing a brief review of every book I read this year. Hope you enjoy and hope it encourages you to keep reading.

NO LIMITS – by John Maxwell

John Maxwell has written many books on Leadership. This one is on helping leaders expand their potential. He begins by helping the reader become aware of how they are and what they are presently capable of. He wants people to know they are probably capable of doing or becoming more than what they realize. He addresses seventeen different areas of capacity with the desire to help you maximize your capacity in each of those areas in your life. He concludes the book with this equation: AWARENESS + ABILITY + CHOICES = CAPACITY. If you wish you could do more, then this book will help you do that.

Learn From Me

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I love to read. You are probably well aware of that as you see me regularly posting reviews on books I have read. I read all kinds of books. I love learning new things and being challenged to think about how I am living my life. I also love to read for entertainment and to relax.

I often go through times where I am focused on a certain topic. Recently, I have been reading on the issue of the Holy Spirit and spiritual renewal personally and for the local church. As you will see from my reviews when I find an author that writes about this, I like to read all he has written.

Over the years I have attended many seminars and pursued life-long learning. I took my first course towards my Masters of Arts in Leadership and Ministry in 1992. My last course was completed in 2018. It took me 26 years to graduate. This was due to a few reasons. I was not always able to afford the cost or time to take another course. But I also preferred learning a little at a time rather than sitting in class for 2-3 years and getting one big dump of knowledge. I love to learn.

Recently, God chastised me regarding my learning focus. I was praying and journaling when God gave me a picture. I was running a race.

There were a number of runners just in front of me but for some reason I wanted to see who it was in front of them, but I just couldn’t see past them. I asked God what this was all about. It seemed unfocused, unclear.

And then it was as if God said, “Learn from me. Don’t just learn from others on the journey, even if they are ahead of you.  Learn from me.” It was a good reminder that my focus should be on Jesus, and listening to and learning from the Holy Spirit. Not just from other people.

Matthew 11: 29 says, “Learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (ESV)

I read my Bible just about every morning, but I have made a commitment to read more of the Bible more often. I want to learn from the Master, not just from others who have learned from the Master.

We fall into this trap quite easily. As believers, we need to regularly read the Bible and hear from God. Too many Christians are content to listen to their pastor and other preachers online or on television while not reading for themselves. Too many people of faith treat hearing from God like a mama bird feeding it’s young, eating only what has been regurgitated for them. God doesn’t want us to be satisfied with others feeding us. He wants us to chew our own food, to read the Bible ourselves and to ruminate over it. We need to personally hear God speak to us and rather than only hear the stories of others who have heard from God.

“Learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

– Jesus

I love that you are reading this blog. Thank you! But I hope you are going to the Master and learning directly from him too. I’m glad that people show up in church to hear the sermon I prepared and preach. But I hope you are taking the time to learn from the Holy Spirit. After all, that is the job of the Holy Spirit. Jesus said, “The Spirit will tell you whatever he receives from me.” (John 16: 15, NLT)

Learn from the Master, and keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Book Reviews: Andy’s 2022 Reading Experience

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I will be sharing a brief review of every book I read this year. Hope you enjoy and hope it encourages you to keep reading.

PATHWAYS TO THE KING – by Dr. Rob Reimer

Pathways to the King: Living a Life of Spiritual Renewal and Power, is another on the Spiritual life by Dr. Rob Reimer. If you want to live a live of Spiritual Renewal and Power, then this book will help you as you move toward that. He uses a number of personal examples to show that it has been quite a journey for him. You will be able to identify with him, no matter where you are at in the journey right now. He helps the reader to get a better understanding of who we are in light of our relationship with God and his Spirit at work within us. Each chapter walks through a way to open ourselves up more to the filling and empowering of the Holy Spirit for personal growth and kingdom effectiveness. Learn to live with a fresh and deepening relationship with the Spirit.

A Few Cautions Against Spiritually Keeping Up with the Joneses

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A natural part of being human is to compare ourselves to others around us. Sometimes we pick out a bad part of their character or how they live and then make ourselves feel better because we are better in that area. Often it is the other way around. We look at others, and feel bad that we can’t attain that level. This could be how much money we have, toys, or status. It could also be about character.

This attitude creeps into our Christian life as well. We have a tendency to notice people who are really gifted in a certain area and we feel bad that we can’t compete. For me, there has been a tendency to compare myself to other pastors, thinking I don’t lead as well or preach as well or grow a church like they can. Our comparison could be in how God has used someone to heal people, or somehow act with the power of the Spirit in a way that we have not experienced ourselves.

Here are a few cautions of why comparing is not helpful.

1. We don’t know the whole story. 

We have heard enough sad stories of people who had great public ministry only to find out later that their private life was a mess. They were sinners just like us. Sure, they had a large platform and a wide audience, but their personal life or their home life suffered greatly. Some of these were terrible to work for. They were mean and bullied their staff.

We don’t see the things that hold others back from being their best. We focus in on one or two key areas that we can see, and then we assume that their whole life is way better than ours. They may have a better position in a church or organization and we envy that, but we don’t know the struggles and the depression they fight as they work to be their best. We see their great family and don’t know the pain they are dealing with in the privacy of their own home.

2. God has gifted us all differently

John Maxwell writes in “No Limits”, about a man who devoted his life to being the second chair. He had realized early on that he was not a good leader. He was great at being the second in command but needed someone above him to be the leader. We need that kind of personal discernment about what we are capable of, how God has gifted us, and what we have learned through experience.

It is valuable for us to learn who we are, how God has gifted us, and how we can best serve God. There are a number of assessment tools out there that may help, but some of it comes with trial and error. Try something, see if you are good at it, and if not, try something else.

I was never going to be a pastor, but the president of the Bible College I attended encouraged me to do a summer intern position. I remember the specific day I was preaching to the small crowd gathered on that warm summer evening in that stuffy church. I was preaching from Philippians – when I suddenly had this feeling, this thought – I like this. I think I could really enjoy doing this. Sometimes it is as we try new things that we discover where we fit.

3. Compare yourself to yourself.

If you want to see how you are really doing, compare yourself to what you were like last year, or five years ago. Have you grown and developed personally in that time? Are you growing in your relationship with Jesus? Are you living in the fullness of the Spirit living in you? Have you figured out some of what you are good at? And are you working to do that and to continue to improve in how well you do?

4. Compare yourself to Scripture.

There are many places in scripture where we are told how to live. We are told what kind of actions and behaviors glorify God. How are you doing with that? As you read the Bible, and I hope you read it regularly, daily, keep asking yourself how well you are doing in regard to what you are reading. Look at how to improve daily. Look at how to develop habits that help you develop into a person who consistently glorifies God with their life.

5. Ask God what He thinks of you.

I have enjoyed having more conversations with God – not just praying to Him, but also hearing from Him. I believe that you can ask God what He thinks of you and He will tell you. Ask God where there are areas you need to grow in and what you can do to grow. Instead of trying to become like someone you admire, become someone God admires. Become who God wants you to be without worrying about how big your audience or your fame is.

The envy of others will never make you a better you. You need to learn to be the best you that you can be. Don’t compare yourself to others. Everyone has their own path. Maybe God will give you a large public voice, and maybe it will be a quiet encouragement to individuals. Like the story of the talents in the Bible, you are only responsible for what you have been given. God has made you with your unique abilities to be you in your own unique way. Your responsibility is to just be the best that you can be, without comparing to others. And then serve Him well.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe