As we come to the end of this year, I want to thank each of you who read this blog. Thank you for allowing me the privilege of sharing from my heart, things I’m learning and discovering in my journey as a pastor and church leader. We serve a great God who loves us deeply – enough to send His Son to die for us and open a way for a personal relationship with Him! We are all learning every day. Thank you for considering my thoughts in your learning.
26 In the sixth month of Elizabeth’s pregnancy, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a town in Galilee, 27 to a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David. The virgin’s name was Mary. 28 The angel went to her and said, “Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you.”
29 Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. 30 But the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary; you have found favor with God. 31 You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus. 32 He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, 33 and he will reign over Jacob’s descendants forever; his kingdom will never end.”
34 “How will this be,” Mary asked the angel, “since I am a virgin?”
35 The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come on you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called[a] the Son of God. 36 Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be unable to conceive is in her sixth month. 37 For no word from God will ever fail.”
38 “I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May your word to me be fulfilled.” Then the angel left her.
Matthew 1:18-25
New International Version
Joseph Accepts Jesus as His Son
18 This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about[a]: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. 19 Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet[b] did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.
20 But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus,[c] because he will save his people from their sins.”
22 All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: 23 “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel”[d] (which means “God with us”).
24 When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. 25 But he did not consummate their marriage until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.
Luke 2:1-7
New International Version
The Birth of Jesus
2 In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. 2 (This was the first census that took place while[a] Quirinius was governor of Syria.) 3 And everyone went to their own town to register.
4 So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. 5 He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. 6 While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, 7 and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.
The church is people. Being a church leader and pastor means being a leader of people. Every leader needs to recognize the value of getting to know the people they lead in a personal way. I enjoy getting to know people because as you get to know people you find out what they are passionate about and how they contribute to their community. Many people have unique skills they are using to help others that you wouldn’t know unless you get to know them.
Personal Connections
Some of the fun of getting to know people is finding you share common friends or have similar origins. When I meet someone for the first time, if I learn that we know the same people or are familiar with the same places, it immediately gives us something to talk about even though we just met.
Unique Skills
Last night, over supper with friends, I learned that the one friend translates children’s songs from English or Spanish into Low German. There are not many Low German children’s songs so she finds good songs in other languages, translates them to Low German as best she can, records herself singing them, and uploads the recording and song for Low German speaking parents to use for their children. I think that is fantastic! I would never have known about her unique contribution to other parents if I had not had opportunity to be in a conversation with her.
Personal Pain
I recently had a conversation with a young couple who are hurting because of an illness in their family. They have had to go through many difficult adjustments as they deal with a family member who lost their memory and the ability to function on their own. As a pastor, hearing the pain in their voices as they shared the story gives me a fuller picture of the realities of their life and and how they are trying to manage life. This informed perspective will also help me be a bit more forgiving when he doesn’t make it to every board meeting because he has unexpected responsibilities to deal with at home. Gaining a fuller understanding of people on our team and people we serve reminds us to view people as humans with complicated lives.
Passions
As we get to know people, we get to know what makes them tick, and what they are passionate about. Some are passionate about people, others about projects. Many people have certain values that they regard with extra importance. For example, knowing which people are passionate about youth or the poor can guide you when recruiting volunteers for youth or the food bank ministries.
Potential Friends
Some people warn pastors not to become friends with people in their church. Others say pastors need to be friends with everyone. Pastors need friends too, and as they get to know people they discover new friends. Its natural that we become better friends with some people in the church than others, so don’t be afraid to get to know people as friends.
I encourage every pastor and church leader to go out of their way to get to know the people they lead. You will gain personally, as will your church, if you get to know them.
As I’m thinking about Christmas and the family celebrations, I am well aware that my mom will not be around this year. She passed away a few months ago. Going to see my Dad at Christmas time will not be the same. There will be an empty spot at the table and a big hole in our conversations where mom would have been.
Blue Christmas Services are special services held in December. Maybe you have had the privilege of taking in one of these services which are designed especially for those who have lost loved ones in the last year. The service includes carols and scriptures like other Christmas services, but it also takes time to acknowledge the pain that many in the service are facing. It is meant to be a time of healing and encouragement for those who are grieving and to give them encouragement as they enter their first Christmas without that loved one present.
The service is a time to remember the hope we have in Christ. All who have put their faith in Christ, if they are gone from here, are present with the Heavenly Father. We have a hope, a certain understanding that to die here is only the doorway into God’s presence.
Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.
1 Thessalonians 4:13-14
As believers in Jesus, we believe that His death and resurrection was for us. We put our faith in Him and receive eternal life. We get a taste of this eternal life already, but don’t experience it’s fullness until we are with Jesus in God’s presence.
When believers die, they are immediately with God. They are immediately ushered into a place of “no more death or mourning or crying or pain” (Revelation 21:4). Not only are they experiencing the joy of being in God’s presence, but they are also immediately removed from all death or mourning or crying or pain. My mom was suffering a lot of pain regularly. She was taking many different medications. Life was difficult at times. But now she is no longer suffering any crying or pain. That is encouraging even as I grieve.
Knowing that she is with Jesus gives me hope. My grieving is not for her, but for my own loss. I am excited and glad for her, but there are times when I feel the loss. We grieve with hope. We feel the loss but are encouraged by the certainty of where we believe she is now.
Are you feeling the pain of missing a loved one this Christmas season? May it not be a grieving without hope. If they had put their faith in Christ, we know that they are with Jesus. And if you have done the same, you will join them eventually as well.
Yes, we grieve. We may go through the different stages of grieving numerous times as we continue to adapt to this person not being around anymore, and still rejoice that they are now in a place of no more crying and pain in the presence of the Heavenly Father. As believers in Jesus and the promises of a future with Him in heaven, we grieve with hope.
Rest doesn’t always come easily for driven people. Many pastors and church leaders are passionate about what they do. They are busy, sometimes with expectations put on them, but often because they see another thing that could be done to help move things forward. There is another person to visit, another meeting to prepare, or a new program to plan for. And Sunday is always coming. Every weekend needs another sermon, and service, and lesson prepared. Rest doesn’t always make it onto the “to do” list.
By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.
Genesis 2: 2-3 (NIV)
We see four things God did as He concluded his creation. He finished, rested, blessed, and made holy the seventh day. God quit working. There was a certain point where God said, “That’s enough,” and he stopped working. Not only did he stop working, but he also rested. He took a break. He paused from the work and enjoyed a rest. And then he made the seventh day special by blessing it, and he “made it holy.” He set aside from all other days as a special day.
The people of Israel were told to celebrate the Sabbath every week. There were strict warnings from God to the Jewish people to keep this day as a day to stop working and rest and delight in Him and His creation.
Most Christians do not keep the Sabbath in the way that the Old Testament taught, and I don’t believe we need to; yet finding time to stop working and to rest and delight in God is still honoring to God and a huge benefit to all believers. For many, especially pastors, Sunday is not a Sabbath rest. This past Sunday was a good example. My wife and I left home in the morning at 8:30 am and did not return until 9:30 pm. We had a full Sunday. I had to set up and teach Sunday School. I then led a special Prayer Service. This was followed by visits to three different homes: lunch with one family, tea with another, and supper with a third. In that time, we debriefed the morning with an elder, anointed and prayed for a sick church member, and enjoyed playing games with some other friends. While not a Sabbath rest, as such, this was a great way to spend a Sunday, enjoying God and people.
Spending time with our church family, learning and worshipping together is part of Sabbath. Praying for people and anointing them with oil can be part of Sabbath. What many church leaders and pastors miss out on is the Sabbath rest aspect. For some, this works on a Sunday. For others, we need to set time aside at another time. My wife already asked me which day I was going to take off this week, but a Sabbath is more than just a day off. A meaningful Sabbath is a time to follow the example of God: to stop working, to rest, to delight in the day and in His Creation, and to contemplate the holiness of God. It may include feasting and church and family and friends. It may include prayer and scripture reading. If you finish the day rested, with your joy refreshed, and feeling God’s pleasure, then you have “sabbathed” well.
I would encourage you to take time in your week to, not just take a day off, but to enjoy God and his creation and rest your body, mind, and soul.
Take time to relax and rest in the presence of God.
Every leader benefits from reading regularly. Even those who do not enjoy reading can benefit from disciplining themselves to read. The authors we read become our mentors. We can benefit from being mentored by those whom we may never meet and who do not know us personally, but who pour into our lives through their written words. Many of us do not have access to pastoral mentors; these authors can become that for us.
As you read, you will find certain authors that you connect with or who seem to speak into your context in a way that you find helpful. There are certain authors I have read at different times depending on the situations I was working in or issues I was facing. Choosing a book allows you the opportunity to tailor your mentoring experience to your specific needs.
Let me share four authors and some of their books I have personally benefited from.
Nelson Searcy is the – founder and lead pastor of The Journey Church in New York and author of a many church leadership books. Many of Searcy’s books are about a specific system that he has developed in his church. I found many of the principles to be adaptable to my situation even in a smaller rural church.
A few of his books that I have benefited from are:
Fusion: Turning First-Time Guests into Fully – Engaged Members of Your Church
Activate: An Entirely New Approach to Small Groups
The Generosity Ladder: Your Next Step to Financial Peace
Maximize: How To Develop Extravagant Givers In Your Church
Andy Stanley is the – founder and lead pastor of North Point Community Church in Alpharetta, Georgia and author of many books, mostly about church leadership. I especially appreciated his teaching on preaching and vision setting.
A few of his books I have benefited from are:
Deep and Wide: Creating Churches Unchurched People Love to Attend
Communicating for a Change: Seven Keys to Irresistible Communication
Visioneering: God’s Blueprint for Developing and Maintaining Personal Vision
Seven Practices of Effective Ministry
Preston Sprinkle is an – author, speaker, and teacher. I have especially appreciated his books addressing gender and same sex attraction, as well as other issues of today.
Here are a few of his books that have helped me understand the discussion around these issues better:
Embodied: Transgender Identities, the Church, and What the Bible Has to Say
People to Be Loved: Why Homosexuality Is Not Just an Issue
Go: Returning Discipleship to the Front Lines of Faith
Fight: A Christian Case for Non-Violence
Thom Rainer – is a writer, researcher, speaker, and founder of Church Answers, a website where many pastors connect and learn together about church ministry and the life of a pastor. His books are usually short but filled with practical advice about the church.
Here are a few of his books I have enjoyed:
Becoming a Welcoming Church
I Will: Nine Traits of the Outwardly Focused Christian
Who Moved My Pulpit?: Leading Change in the Church
Unchurched Next Door
I read a lot, but these are a couple of authors I have read often and enjoyed how they spoke into my life and ministry.
Invite leaders to mentor you as you read their books. Learn from their experience and expertise. Look for a couple of nuggets that apply directly to you as you read. And keep on learning.
I had the privilege this past week of spending a day with others who have a similar role as I do. We don’t actually work together on the same projects or in the same church, but we are all part of the same denomination functioning in the role of transition pastors. There is a special joy in connecting with people who know your role and the situations you face because they face those situations, too. In the past, I was able to connect with fellow rural pastors and pastors in the same region. We may not all serve the same church, but we can connect and relate to shared experiences because of our similar roles.
It may feel like getting to know and spend time with these teammates takes too much time or effort that could be used for other priorities, but I have personally found value in connecting with others who understand my roles.
They understand the frustrations and joys.
When I met with rural pastors as a rural pastor, I knew that they understood what small-town life was like. They understood the realities of serving a smaller church. When I meet with transition pastors, they know what it is like to face church conflict and to try to mediate it. Transition pastors know what it is like to help churches, to fall in love with them, and then have to move on to a new assignment in a year or two.
When you are talking with others who know your role, you can share jokes and stories that they understand. They are “in the know” because they do the same things you do. Other transition pastors know the frustration of churches that do not want to change, even though they know they need to. They understand the joy of a board catching God’s vision together as they plan vision and strategy for the church.
They can provide ideas and advice.
When I meet with transition pastors, I know they use similar tools and processes as I do in helping churches transition. Transition pastors know what it is like to help churches build on the past to look to the future. One of the benefits of my recent meeting with other transition pastors is to learn about how they handle particular situations. Most of them have more experience in this role than I do so I love to soak up ideas as they talk about their ministry.
They can pray for me with understanding and clarity.
One of the joys of meeting with others in similar roles is that we can pray for each other with an understanding of the situations we face. Often we don’t even have to finish our story and the others are already smiling or nodding or even crying as they have gone through similar situations. They can pray for me, and I pray for them, with clarity because we have seen very similar situations where we have served.
I encourage you to find others who are in a similar situation as you. You need to find “your people” so you can have people around to encourage you and help guide you as you need input and wisdom from them.
Life and ministry can be busy times. Maybe you have taken on too many commitments. Maybe someone else piled responsibilities on you that you can’t ignore. Maybe you thought you had time for everything until an unexpected demand popped up. This happened to me recently. I had accepted a number of responsibilities and thought I could manage them until I found a leak in my shower. Now I had the added work of dealing with house repairs that I am not skilled at and do not love doing. I was beginning to feel quite overwhelmed and wondered how I would get everything done.
As my anxiety started to rise, I paused my day to spend some time with God. As I was praying, I began to get some clarity and peace, trusting God to help me get done what had to be done by the appropriate deadlines while also dealing with my house. Here are some of the steps I took to focus on one thing at a time:
Pause the “doing” to be with God
I took on the various responsibilities because I believed God was guiding me in accepting them. With that in mind, I handed it all over to Him and asked him to give me the time necessary to get it all done on time. I was reminded too, that God was not surprised by my house issues. So if God put these responsibilities in my lap, then he will give me the capacity to get them done.
Remove anything from your to do list that is not important for now
Sometimes we feel a duty to do something that we don’t really need to do. I had to reevaluate some of my goals and responsibilities and either eliminate some, or push them to next week.
Plan my day and week.
With God’s help, I began plotting all my responsibilities, along with their deadlines, onto my calendar. I tried to spread out the different requirements across the whole week. Then I considered all that I felt I had to accomplish for today. As I looked at the list, I started listing them in order of priority. If I could not complete all the tasks, at least the ones that had to get done today would get done.
Focus on one thing at a time.
When we get loaded down with responsibilities, we can get overwhelmed because we see it all in front of us. If we can break it down to what must be done this week, and this day, and this morning, we begin to narrow our focus. And if we tackle one thing at a time, giving it our full attention, we can begin to whittle away at the pile.
It doesn’t matter how big the pile is, you can only deal with one thing at a time, so choose one thing and give it your best. You could even tell yourself you are focusing on this for a certain amount of time, and when that time is up, you will tackle something else before coming back to the first task.
Celebrate your accomplishments
I find it quite exhilarating to be able to check off the items on my calendar as I complete them. It feels good to see the momentum beginning to build toward completion of all the different tasks.
Yes, life can be very busy at times, busier than we had planned, but God can help us grow in capacity so that we can get things done faster than we thought and can complete our list one task at a time. If God wants us to do it, he will help us to get it done.
The other day, I was speaking with someone who mentioned a “bumpy rug.” She was referring to the practice of ignoring problems and “sweeping them under the rug.” Another similar comment I heard recently was, “Let’s just get this behind us as soon as possible.” In both cases, people were dealing with sin in families and organizations. Both cases reflected a desire to move past the sin and the hurt it caused others as quickly as possible without a desire to actually address the sin and correct it.
Very few people enjoy conflict. The average person will go out of their way to avoid it. It is not fun when others are mad at you, even if you are doing the right thing. Our desire to get along and please people means that we will try to move past problems without confronting the issue and dealing with it.
We need to learn to work through the personal pain of a conflict to pursue correction, forgiveness, and reconciliation. We need to see the value of restored relationships both with God and with each other. We need to see the importance of repentance and forgiveness to help people truly get past a problem brought on by sin. We need to see the importance of pointing out sin that is affecting others in the family and in the church.
We forget that Jesus gave clear direction on how to handle sin with a Christian brother or sister in Matthew 18: 15-17.
“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.
Jesus does not advise getting past sin quickly, and definitely does not suggest sweeping it under the rug. Jesus suggest confrontation. He gives some steps. First, go by yourself to the person you know has sinned and point out their sin. Do not tell others about it. Do not take a party with you. Go by yourself.
The second and third steps are only taken if the first did not resolve the situation. So, second, if the sinner does not respond with repentance then take one or two others with you to confirm you are not just making a personal judgement. With two or three others, you can determine if the person really has sin they need to deal with.
Third, if the first two steps do not resolve the issue, then tell it to the church. The hope is that the church will push for what is right and stand for truth and righteousness rather than sweep it under the rug. Too many churches prefer the bumpy rug to the pain of confronting and dealing with a sinning brother or sister.
There is one last step. If the person does not listen and does not correct their ways, treat them as someone who is no longer part of the church. This is a very difficult step for any church to take, yet Jesus teaches this so we know there must be times when his teaching should be applied.
We need to remove the persistent sinner from any leadership in the church yet continue to love them and pray for them and look for opportunities to draw them back to Jesus.
Jesus did not write off tax collectors and pagans but invited them to follow him. He even called Matthew, the tax collector, to be one of his disciples. Jesus treated pagans and tax collectors as potential disciples, if only they would leave their sin behind. Even as we can’t allow the persistent sinner a place of leadership in the church, we continue to point them to Jesus, with the hope that they will repent and surrender their hearts to Jesus again.
Let’s choose to pursue reconciliation, not allow more bumps under the rug!
Our shower had mushrooms growing next to it. This happened a few months ago, so I did my best to seal up places where they were growing and places where water seemed to have leaked from the shower. All was good for a few months, until recently, the mushrooms were back.
I am not a renovator or construction worker of any kind, but I had to step and deal with this. My temporary fix was just that – temporary. I had to tear out the whole shower, piece by piece until I got down to the bare bathroom floor. I tore out the wet, damaged drywall and put some fans to work drying everything out. I was glad to see there were no other leaks. Whoever installed the shower just didn’t seal things well. I’m now in the process of replacing drywall, mudding, and painting in preparation of reinstalling the shower. This time I will ensure that everything is sealed. Leakage causes damage.
“Leakage” can happen in a number of ways in our lives, as something begins to deteriorate but it happens so slowly we don’t recognize it until a “mushroom” or other weird side-effect pops up that tells us something is wrong.
It could be that we are experiencing leakage in a relationship with a friend. We realize that something is wrong. The friend seems to be avoiding you. Maybe you have even tried a temporary fix like I did with my shower, trying to address the issue without creating a problem, yet you realize something is still wrong. More drastic measures need to be taken for a satisfactory resolution is reached. You need to face the issue head on and ask your friend directly about what is wrong, and how the relationship can be repaired to its original closeness and openness.
Leakage may happen in one’s spiritual life. Sometimes we get lazy in our walk with God. We allow sinful habits to creep in. If we recognize something is wrong, it may already mean it is time for some drastic measures. We can gradually allow others to influence us in directions that are not good and honorable. There are times we need to assess our friendship with Jesus and determine new patterns and habits to address the leakage. It may be beneficial to start practicing a few spiritual disciplines to get us back on track. Depending on the situation, we may want to find a friend or small group to help hold us accountable to the corrections we make.
An organization, a team, a church may all experience leakage of vision and purpose. Over time, the organization, including the leadership team, can forget what their vision is all about. Team members begin to do things that no longer match up with the values and vision agreed to at first. Sometimes a little adjustment of a reminder may be all that is required. Other times, a more drastic measure may be needed. It may require a full day of “re-visioning” with your team, returning to or reviving the vision that you all adopted in the beginning.
Leakage is often not noticeable until the issue is big, because leakage happens gradually over time. Once noticed, it must be addressed.
Leakage can be addressed with a few steps. First, like with my shower, you may recognize something happening that does not line up with the original purpose of the shower. I had no intention of growing mushrooms in my bathroom. Something was wrong.
Second, if a simple fix doesn’t cure the problem, drastic measures may be needed. I had to tear the whole shower out. You may need to address the issue head on.
Third, make sure you get a clear picture of what the problem is so you can then address it correctly.
And, fourth, do the difficult and time consuming work or correcting the problem. You will be glad you did.
Leakage causes damage. Don’t ignore the signs when you see them and address them appropriately as soon as you can.
Elevate with Andy 