Leading a Small Group with Discipleship in Mind

Much has been written about small groups as a valuable way to help believers grow. Churches often have unique names for their small groups depending on the priority of the group. Regardless of what these groups are called, churches that have small groups have an opportunity to disciple those in each group. As a leader, you can use your regular meetings to point everyone to Jesus again and again. This applies whether it is a task small group, friendship small group, or a Bible study small group. Here are a few suggestions for leading your small group with discipleship in mind.

  1. Pray together. Always take time to pray, even if it is just a brief time. Some members of your group may not typically pray in their day-to-day lives or may feel awkward or unfamiliar with praying. By leading in prayer, they see prayer modeled and may then learn how to pray themselves. So prayer will be an opportunity to bring requests to God as well as disciple people in how to pray.
  • Teach your small group to pray. Beyond modeling, you can show your group how to use prayers in the Bible as examples of how they can pray. You could start with the Lord’s Prayer, but there are many other prayers, especially in Paul’s letter and in the Psalms, which could be great examples for the amateur pray-er.
  • Read Scripture. Even if your group is not a Bible study group, you can still take time to read a few verses of scripture. This may be all the scripture some members read or hear that day. Remind them that God speaks to everyday situations. Even if your group is a task group that gathers to accomplish a certain purpose, such as a worship team that meets to practice for Sunday’s service, take time to read from God’s Word. If you are putting discipleship as a priority, then it is always appropriate to read scripture and pray.
  • Get personal. Sometimes we are so focused on the goal of the group, that we forget that we are all people who long for connection. We want to be noticed. We want people to express interest in our lives and concern for our well-being. Sometimes, in a Bible study, we jump so quickly to the Scriptures that we don’t notice that some members of the group are hurting, and others are excited about life and both want and need to share with someone. Take time to share something personal every time so you get to know each other and find ways of encouraging those who need it.
  • Teach something new. I used to think that discipleship only included teaching and equipping believers in “spiritual” things, yet discipleship can be very practical. A music small group may appreciate learning a new song, or a new creative way to engage their audience. A Bible study group may enjoy learning a new Bible Study method that helps them engage with scripture in a new way. Get creative, but look for ways to teach something new.
  •  Equip your small group. While this is connected to teaching something new, this specifically focuses on helping your group members improve a skill or grow in faith disciplines. The goal might be developing new Bible study methods that enable your members to move beyond just reading scripture to interacting and studying it. Maybe you can equip them in something practical such as how to buy a new Bible, how to make friends with their neighbour, or how to lead a small group so new leaders are raised up regularly.
  • Encourage your small group to consider God’s purpose for them. No matter what kind of group you lead, the believers in that group need to recognize that God has a purpose for them. Point them to scriptures that talk about loving God and loving others. Encourage them to try new things and see how God uses them. Encourage them to ask God about their purpose and then to live into it boldly.

No matter what kind of small group you lead in your church, each member needs to grow in their faith. Lead in such a way that they are discipled in the process.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Make Prayer a Priority

We have the incredible opportunity to talk with our Heavenly Father regularly. 1 John 5:14 tells us: “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.” We can come to God in prayer, not afraid of him, not afraid we are intruding on his time, or worried that what we are asking is too trivial for him to care about. As pastors, we need to help the members of our church know they can talk to God in prayer too, and often.

Personal Prayer
It begins with the pastor’s prayer life. If you are not praying, it will be difficult to lead your congregation in prayer, You need to lead by going ahead. You need to talk with God often – not just because you are a pastor, but because you are a follower of Jesus. Have a conversation with him. Expect him to answer your prayers. Talk to him about your own spiritual life. Talk to him about your family. Pray for your church members by name. Use a prayer list to help you pray for everyone. Pray for specific aspects of their lives.

Implement practices that will help you improve your praying. Schedule a regular time daily for prayer. Read books on prayer. Read the prayers of the Bible. Equip yourself so that you can equip others.

Hands of a man praying in solitude with his Bible.

Corporate Prayer

Make sure that your church is a “house of prayer.” Include prayer in any meetings you have. Make sure you pray in your services. I attended a church once where the sermon was on prayer and the only prayer in the service was a quick wrap-up after the sermon. That is not good. Yes, we need to read scripture, and we need to worship in song, but we also need to pray.

Schedule prayer events for the church throughout the week. Plan regular prayer meetings. If you have small groups, ensure that the groups are taking time for prayer. You could even give them a guide or a list of things to pray for each week or each month. The “prayer chain” has been replaced in many churches with more updated options, but find an app that works for your church where you can share prayer requests with the whole church quickly, calling on everyone to pray for certain needs.

Special Prayer Opportunities

It is good to plan special prayer events or focuses throughout the year. I have often invited the church to a “3-week prayer” focus on a certain theme or topic, providing a guide which includes a few verses of scripture and prayer requests to pray.

Setting aside a “day of prayer” can be a good way to focus the church on prayer all day for one day. Invite people to come pray together at the church early in the morning before they go to work. Invite people to connect to an online prayer event over the lunch hour. Have a special prayer service in the evening. Send out hourly prayer reminders and encouragements to keep people praying.

In one church, we did an all-night “prayer vigil” open to all teens and adults. We began with a Saturday evening prayer service. People signed up to pray for an hour. Some people came on their own, some came as a group. One group in the middle of the night was three teen girls. One group early in the morning was dads and their sons. People could choose to follow guides prepared for them to read and pray through. Then, Sunday morning, we had a Celebration Service where we worshipped God, and people shared some of what they had experienced and heard from God!!

Let’s remember that we have a God who loves us and wants to have a regular conversation with us. We can go to him with anything and anytime. And, Pastors, let’s make sure we help our church to pray too.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Pastors Are Doing Too Much!

Pastors do a large part of what is required in the work of most churches; after all, that is their role. And pastors are quick to take on duties that are not part of their responsibility. Pastors face the temptation to do too much. They often do more than their job description asks of them, doing things that others in the church could do.

As time passes, pastors slowly add more tasks to their plate thinking it’s easier to take on one more duty than to find someone else to do the job, especially if they need to be trained to do it. Rather than train a volunteer to design and print the weekly bulletin, the pastor takes it on. After all, “it’s only going to take about an hour.” Rather than finding someone else to look after locking up on Sunday, the pastor just does it. Slowly, the pastor does more and more of what someone else in the church could be doing. And, in a sense, without realizing it, pastors are hoarding the work of the ministry.

A few churches that I have heard from that saw value in the time they had between pastors alluded to this tendency. They found the transition period was good for their church because when the pastor left, more people in the congregation felt the freedom to step up and serve.

Churches in transition may see new opportunities for people to serve in those extra duties that the pastor took on that were outside of his role. As they look for people to serve, new people are stepping up and getting involved. The work is shared with more people, and there is a greater sense of everyone playing a part.

Pastors, we need to delegate. This is discipleship. This is mentoring. This is equipping. When we show a volunteer how to lock up or do the bulletin, we are equipping them with information and skills they did not have and were not using before. When we train a volunteer to manage the prayer chain, we disciple them, helping them to be part of the prayer ministry. When we train others to lead small groups, we are discipling.

And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others.

2 Timothy 2:2 (NIV)

It is too easy for pastors to think that discipleship is only about spiritual things or helping people learn to share their faith. Pastors need to recognize that discipleship is about other parts of the Christian life too, the practical ways that people can learn to contribute to the work of the church and the expansion of God’s kingdom. Discipleship includes training someone to be an usher or training a new sound person. It includes training people to be good greeters.

Pastors have the responsibility of equipping their members for acts of service. In Ephesians 4:11-13, the Apostle Paul stated the roles of church leadership: “to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up.” Pastors must equip members to serve, so hand off some of the responsibilities you have been carrying.

Pastors, let’s not take on roles in the church that the Holy Spirit has gifted others to do. The Holy Spirit gives spiritual gifts to every believer in the church. Help each member find their areas of gifting and release them to serve, even if it means a little extra effort on our part to equip and disciple them.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Guard Your Reputation!

What people think about you because of what they have observed about you makes a difference as to whether people will want to spend time with you or even listen to what you say.

People are always observing you and your actions, and when they do, they instantly make assessments about who you are and what you are like. As people see you act you gain a reputation. It may be a good one, it may be a negative one. The only way you can gain a good reputation is by being careful about how you act and how you treat people.

Reputation is not about being a people pleaser. This is not about trying to gain the favour of all people by only doing what you think others expect. It is about knowing who you are and what you stand for, and then consistently living that out. But your reputation is also about more than yourself, especially if you are a follower of Christ.

In 1 Timothy 3:7, the apostle Paul describes the attributes of church leaders:  

He must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil’s trap.

One of the characteristics of a church leader is to have a good reputation “with outsiders.” This is not just about a good reputation with other believers in your church, but also with those who do not yet know Jesus. Thus characteristic does not just apply to church leaders; churches, too, must be filled with people who have good reputations because this is where leaders are developed.     

The word translated “reputation” in 1 Timothy 3:7 could also be translated as “testimony.” So the church leader, or Christians in general, should have a good testimony. This means that their life and words should match up. What they believe and stand for should be evident in how they live their lives and how they interact with believers and unbelievers.

Why? 1 Timothy 3:7 indicates that a good reputation may help a person avoid “falling into disgrace and into the devil’s trap”. A bad reputation may bring personal disgrace, – as well as bring disgrace on the church you are part of and on the Christ you say you believe in. An inconsistent walk could lead a church leader into the devil’s trap where they are no longer living a good testimony and reflecting well on Christ. The bad reputation is then earned by not consistently honoring Jesus with our life. The devil would like nothing better than to make Jesus Christ or his followers look bad.

Guard your reputation, not just so you look good, but to help make Jesus look good! Make sure your belief in Jesus matches the way you do life and conduct your business. You do not want your reputation to cause others to lose interest in Jesus. Live a consistently God-honoring life!

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Ready to Preach, Pray, or Die

There’s an old saying describing how a pastor should be ready for anything at anytime. A pastor should always be ready to preach, pray, or die. I thought of this saying the other day because of a situation I found myself in.

A friend asked me to join him in praying for a friend of his. We were going to meet in my office at the church with the plan of entering into a time of spiritual warfare. His friend did not know Jesus and was facing some torment in his life. His prayers to the god of his religion had not accomplished anything. He was desperate and was now willing to have us pray to our God for him.

One of my first thoughts was, I’m glad I am ready for this. This is going to be a spiritually significant encounter, and I am glad there is no unconfessed sin in my life. I am right with God and feel empowered to be his servant in this situation. It reminded me of the saying to be ready to preach, pray, or die. I wanted nothing in the way if I was going to ask God to fight on behalf of this friend. I was ready.

 As I contemplated this, I realized how absurd this thought was. As followers of Jesus, we should always be ready to serve God in any capacity He invites us into; not just on the occasion when we “feel” ready. Not only pastors, but all Christians should strive to be right with God at all times, ready to serve Him in any way He asks. We should not be afraid to enter into spiritual warfare, as if we had reason to think that we had to do something to prepare first. If we are in right relationship with God, through faith in His Son Jesus, then we are always ready to serve God, no matter what He asks of us.

We should always live our lives free of sin. All sin should be confessed as early and as quickly as we recognize it. We should never carry sin in our life, waiting for a specific moment to deal with it. Deal with it immediately and makes sure you are right with God. Like David, in Psalm 51, desire to live a forgiven life where we are always ready to teach others. We should never harbor sin of any kind. We should always be clean and ready for service to our God.

We need to pray regularly. We need to be in daily communication with God. We need to read Scripture to learn and hear from God, but we also need to be talking with Him all the time. I paused for more prayer as I knew this encounter was coming up in a few hours, but I already had a prayed-up life as I have regular times of prayer with God.

We should continue to build up our faith. We need to remind ourselves regularly of the goodness and faithfulness of God. He provides all we need. He answers prayer. He is with us all the time in all things we face. As we continue to remind ourselves of the great God we serve, we are also equipping ourselves to serve Him when the serving may be difficult. I was not quite sure what to expect but I knew whatever the situation was going to be, God is bigger than anyone or anything else. I had faith in God to handle the situation.

I encourage you to live your life always read to “preach, pray, or die,” always ready to serve Him in whatever situation He may place in front of you.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

The Fun of Getting to Know People

The church is people. Being a church leader and pastor means being a leader of people. Every leader needs to recognize the value of getting to know the people they lead in a personal way. I enjoy getting to know people because as you get to know people you find out what they are passionate about and how they contribute to their community. Many people have unique skills they are using to help others that you wouldn’t know unless you get to know them.

Personal Connections

Some of the fun of getting to know people is finding you share common friends or have similar origins. When I meet someone for the first time, if I learn that we know the same people or are familiar with the same places, it immediately gives us something to talk about even though we just met.

Unique Skills

Last night, over supper with friends, I learned that the one friend translates children’s songs from English or Spanish into Low German. There are not many Low German children’s songs so she finds good songs in other languages, translates them to Low German as best she can, records herself singing them, and uploads the recording and song for Low German speaking parents to use for their children. I think that is fantastic! I would never have known about her unique contribution to other parents if I had not had opportunity to be in a conversation with her.

Personal Pain

I recently had a conversation with a young couple who are hurting because of an illness in their family. They have had to go through many difficult adjustments as they deal with a family member who lost their memory and the ability to function on their own. As a pastor, hearing the pain in their voices as they shared the story gives me a fuller picture of the realities of their life and and how they are trying to manage life. This informed perspective will also help me be a bit more forgiving when he doesn’t make it to every board meeting because he has unexpected responsibilities to deal with at home. Gaining a fuller understanding of people on our team and people we serve reminds us to view people as humans with complicated lives.

Passions

As we get to know people, we get to know what makes them tick, and what they are passionate about. Some are passionate about people, others about projects. Many people have certain values that they regard with extra importance. For example, knowing which people are passionate about youth or the poor can guide you when recruiting volunteers for youth or the food bank ministries.

Potential Friends

Some people warn pastors not to become friends with people in their church. Others say pastors need to be friends with everyone. Pastors need friends too, and as they get to know people they discover new friends. Its natural that we become better friends with some people in the church than others, so don’t be afraid to get to know people as friends.

I encourage every pastor and church leader to go out of their way to get to know the people they lead. You will gain personally, as will your church, if you get to know them.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Reconciliation or a Bumpy Rug?

The other day, I was speaking with someone who mentioned a “bumpy rug.” She was referring to the practice of ignoring problems and “sweeping them under the rug.” Another similar comment I heard recently was, “Let’s just get this behind us as soon as possible.” In both cases, people were dealing with sin in families and organizations. Both cases reflected a desire to move past the sin and the hurt it caused others as quickly as possible without a desire to actually address the sin and correct it.

Very few people enjoy conflict. The average person will go out of their way to avoid it. It is not fun when others are mad at you, even if you are doing the right thing. Our desire to get along and please people means that we will try to move past problems without confronting the issue and dealing with it.

We need to learn to work through the personal pain of a conflict to pursue correction, forgiveness, and reconciliation. We need to see the value of restored relationships both with God and with each other. We need to see the importance of repentance and forgiveness to help people truly get past a problem brought on by sin. We need to see the importance of pointing out sin that is affecting others in the family and in the church.

We forget that Jesus gave clear direction on how to handle sin with a Christian brother or sister in Matthew 18: 15-17.

“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.

Jesus does not advise getting past sin quickly, and definitely does not suggest sweeping it under the rug. Jesus suggest confrontation. He gives some steps. First, go by yourself to the person you know has sinned and point out their sin. Do not tell others about it. Do not take a party with you. Go by yourself.

The second and third steps are only taken if the first did not resolve the situation. So, second, if the sinner does not respond with repentance then take one or two others with you to confirm you are not just making a personal judgement. With two or three others, you can determine if the person really has sin they need to deal with.

Third, if the first two steps do not resolve the issue, then tell it to the church. The hope is that the church will push for what is right and stand for truth and righteousness rather than sweep it under the rug. Too many churches prefer the bumpy rug to the pain of confronting and dealing with a sinning brother or sister.

There is one last step. If the person does not listen and does not correct their ways, treat them as someone who is no longer part of the church. This is a very difficult step for any church to take, yet Jesus teaches this so we know there must be times when his teaching should be applied.

We need to remove the persistent sinner from any leadership in the church yet continue to love them and pray for them and look for opportunities to draw them back to Jesus.

Jesus did not write off tax collectors and pagans but invited them to follow him. He even called Matthew, the tax collector, to be one of his disciples. Jesus treated pagans and tax collectors as potential disciples, if only they would leave their sin behind. Even as we can’t allow the persistent sinner a place of leadership in the church, we continue to point them to Jesus, with the hope that they will repent and surrender their hearts to Jesus again.

Let’s choose to pursue reconciliation, not allow more bumps under the rug!

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Leakage Causes Damage!

Our shower had mushrooms growing next to it. This happened a few months ago, so I did my best to seal up places where they were growing and places where water seemed to have leaked from the shower. All was good for a few months, until recently, the mushrooms were back.

I am not a renovator or construction worker of any kind, but I had to step and deal with this. My temporary fix was just that – temporary. I had to tear out the whole shower, piece by piece until I got down to the bare bathroom floor. I tore out the wet, damaged drywall and put some fans to work drying everything out. I was glad to see there were no other leaks. Whoever installed the shower just didn’t seal things well. I’m now in the process of replacing drywall, mudding, and painting in preparation of reinstalling the shower. This time I will ensure that everything is sealed. Leakage causes damage.

“Leakage” can happen in a number of ways in our lives, as something begins to deteriorate but it happens so slowly we don’t recognize it until a “mushroom” or other weird side-effect pops up that tells us something is wrong.

It could be that we are experiencing leakage in a relationship with a friend. We realize that something is wrong. The friend seems to be avoiding you. Maybe you have even tried a temporary fix like I did with my shower, trying to address the issue without creating a problem, yet you realize something is still wrong. More drastic measures need to be taken for a satisfactory resolution is reached. You need to face the issue head on and ask your friend directly about what is wrong, and how the relationship can be repaired to its original closeness and openness.

Leakage may happen in one’s spiritual life. Sometimes we get lazy in our walk with God. We allow sinful habits to creep in. If we recognize something is wrong, it may already mean it is time for some drastic measures. We can gradually allow others to influence us in directions that are not good and honorable. There are times we need to assess our friendship with Jesus and determine new patterns and habits to address the leakage. It may be beneficial to start practicing a few spiritual disciplines to get us back on track. Depending on the situation, we may want to find a friend or small group to help hold us accountable to the corrections we make.

An organization, a team, a church may all experience leakage of vision and purpose. Over time, the organization, including the leadership team, can forget what their vision is all about. Team members begin to do things that no longer match up with the values and vision agreed to at first. Sometimes a little adjustment of a reminder may be all that is required. Other times, a more drastic measure may be needed. It may require a full day of “re-visioning” with your team, returning to or reviving the vision that you all adopted in the beginning.

Leakage is often not noticeable until the issue is big, because leakage happens gradually over time. Once noticed, it must be addressed.

Leakage can be addressed with a few steps. First, like with my shower, you may recognize something happening that does not line up with the original purpose of the shower. I had no intention of growing mushrooms in my bathroom. Something was wrong.

Second, if a simple fix doesn’t cure the problem, drastic measures may be needed. I had to tear the whole shower out. You may need to address the issue head on.

Third, make sure you get a clear picture of what the problem is so you can then address it correctly.

And, fourth, do the difficult and time consuming work or correcting the problem. You will be glad you did.

Leakage causes damage. Don’t ignore the signs when you see them and address them appropriately as soon as you can.

|Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

A Grateful Heart

When parents are raising their children, they teach them how to be polite and how to live into the culture around them. One of the values parents often try to instill into their children is to say thanks. Parents often remind their children to, “Say thank you.” Or they ask the child, “What do you say?” They want the child to express their gratefulness when they receive something.

Luke 17 tells us a story of ten men sick with leprosy who met Jesus. They stood at a distance, respectful of Jesus who did not have the disease, and called out for Jesus to have pity on them. Jesus tells them to go show themselves to the priest.  As they went to do so, they were cleansed. (The Old Testament Law said the priest was the only one who could declare a person clean after a sickness.)

We might applaud the faith of these ten in going to do what Jesus said even though they were not cleansed yet. They were only healed as they headed to find the priest. But they were healed!

Here comes the important part of the story. Yes, they were healed, but what did they do after that? We are told that one of the men who had just been healed, instead of continuing to the priest, turned around, came back, praised God with a loud voice, threw himself at Jesus’ feet, and thanked him. Ten were healed; one came to thank the healer.

 Jesus responded, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?” Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.” (Luke 17: 17-19)

How many times have we completely forgotten to give thanks, enjoying God’s goodness to us as if we deserved it?

We have a special day in our year that we stop to say “thanks.” Thanksgiving is coming up shortly. While it is good to have one day a year to give thanks, we need to cultivate a grateful heart and to develop an attitude of gratitude. As Paul encourages us in Ephesians 5:20, “always giving thanks to God the Father for everything.” Can we learn to give thanks regularly and not just on special occasions?

God is good to us in many ways every day. We take so much for granted, that we need reminders to pause and give thanks. If one wants a grateful heart, it means being intentional in giving thanks. Include thanksgiving in your prayers. Give thanks with your family around the dinner table. Thank God for His goodness in your life. Thank God for the unusual things and the answers to prayer. But also thank God for the things we receive from Him every day. The air we breathe, the food we eat, water to drink. Thank Him for creation we can enjoy. Autumne in my part of the world is a beautiful experience as the leaves change color and start to drop from the trees. Notice God’s beauty around you and give thanks.

Every time we give thanks, we remind ourselves that we depend on God for many things in our life. It is a reminder to us that we need God, and we benefit greatly from the good gifts He gives us!

Thanksgiving is coming soon, but don’t wait for that special day to give thanks!

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

The Benefits of Rituals

It’s fall, and children are heading back to school. Though we have no school age children in our house anymore, I’m reminded of those hectic school mornings. Often it is a race against time to get the children dressed, fed, and backpack loaded to get them out off to school on time. This is an example where rituals could be of great benefit.

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ritual /rĭch′oo͞-əl/

noun

  1. A ceremony in which the actions and wording follow a prescribed form and order.

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Rituals are helpful patterns for life. These are steps we go through on a regular basis that ensure we don’t forget something and get it done on time. Rituals could help children be less rushed in the morning before they head off to school. Check out the examples below.

Before going to bed the night before:

  • Lay out the next day’s clothes.
  • Pack the backpack with everything except the lunch.
  • Pack the lunch and place in the fridge.

Morning rituals:

  • Pack lunch in backpack before breakfast.
  • Place backpack beside your shoes at the door.
  • Breakfast at the same time every morning.

It may be helpful to have a ritual for the start of your workday as a pastor or church leader. Instead of showing up in your office with no idea what the day will look like, you can have a plan to start the day right. A ritual can help you make the most the first part of your day.

To set up helpful rituals you need to think through what you already do, deciding which things happen every day and could help you start the day right. A morning ritual may look like this:

  • Begin with prayer, asking God to guide your day.
  • Check emails and quickly decide which to respond to or which to put on your to-do list to deal with later.
  • Plan your day, and note appointments already schedule or deadlines that need to be met.

You may find it helpful to have some “end of day” rituals which prepare you for a good start the next day:

  • List anything that needs to be followed up from the day.
  • Make your to-do list for the next day.
  • Note appointments that have already been made.

For rituals to be helpful, they need to be personal to you. They need to be steps you will take.

Rituals can help in many areas of our work life. I have rituals for how I go about preparing my weekly sermons. I have rituals I follow in preparing to teach a class. I have rituals in how I ensure I am ready for Sunday morning. These rituals help me to make sure I don’t forget something and save time because I don’t have to think up new patterns every time.

A few benefits of rituals are that you are less likely to forget important steps, you will be more organized, and life will be just a little less hectic. Enjoy establishing meaningful rituals.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe