Discipleship

Reconciliation or a Bumpy Rug?

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The other day, I was speaking with someone who mentioned a “bumpy rug.” She was referring to the practice of ignoring problems and “sweeping them under the rug.” Another similar comment I heard recently was, “Let’s just get this behind us as soon as possible.” In both cases, people were dealing with sin in families and organizations. Both cases reflected a desire to move past the sin and the hurt it caused others as quickly as possible without a desire to actually address the sin and correct it.

Very few people enjoy conflict. The average person will go out of their way to avoid it. It is not fun when others are mad at you, even if you are doing the right thing. Our desire to get along and please people means that we will try to move past problems without confronting the issue and dealing with it.

We need to learn to work through the personal pain of a conflict to pursue correction, forgiveness, and reconciliation. We need to see the value of restored relationships both with God and with each other. We need to see the importance of repentance and forgiveness to help people truly get past a problem brought on by sin. We need to see the importance of pointing out sin that is affecting others in the family and in the church.

We forget that Jesus gave clear direction on how to handle sin with a Christian brother or sister in Matthew 18: 15-17.

“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.

Jesus does not advise getting past sin quickly, and definitely does not suggest sweeping it under the rug. Jesus suggest confrontation. He gives some steps. First, go by yourself to the person you know has sinned and point out their sin. Do not tell others about it. Do not take a party with you. Go by yourself.

The second and third steps are only taken if the first did not resolve the situation. So, second, if the sinner does not respond with repentance then take one or two others with you to confirm you are not just making a personal judgement. With two or three others, you can determine if the person really has sin they need to deal with.

Third, if the first two steps do not resolve the issue, then tell it to the church. The hope is that the church will push for what is right and stand for truth and righteousness rather than sweep it under the rug. Too many churches prefer the bumpy rug to the pain of confronting and dealing with a sinning brother or sister.

There is one last step. If the person does not listen and does not correct their ways, treat them as someone who is no longer part of the church. This is a very difficult step for any church to take, yet Jesus teaches this so we know there must be times when his teaching should be applied.

We need to remove the persistent sinner from any leadership in the church yet continue to love them and pray for them and look for opportunities to draw them back to Jesus.

Jesus did not write off tax collectors and pagans but invited them to follow him. He even called Matthew, the tax collector, to be one of his disciples. Jesus treated pagans and tax collectors as potential disciples, if only they would leave their sin behind. Even as we can’t allow the persistent sinner a place of leadership in the church, we continue to point them to Jesus, with the hope that they will repent and surrender their hearts to Jesus again.

Let’s choose to pursue reconciliation, not allow more bumps under the rug!

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Leakage Causes Damage!

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Our shower had mushrooms growing next to it. This happened a few months ago, so I did my best to seal up places where they were growing and places where water seemed to have leaked from the shower. All was good for a few months, until recently, the mushrooms were back.

I am not a renovator or construction worker of any kind, but I had to step and deal with this. My temporary fix was just that – temporary. I had to tear out the whole shower, piece by piece until I got down to the bare bathroom floor. I tore out the wet, damaged drywall and put some fans to work drying everything out. I was glad to see there were no other leaks. Whoever installed the shower just didn’t seal things well. I’m now in the process of replacing drywall, mudding, and painting in preparation of reinstalling the shower. This time I will ensure that everything is sealed. Leakage causes damage.

“Leakage” can happen in a number of ways in our lives, as something begins to deteriorate but it happens so slowly we don’t recognize it until a “mushroom” or other weird side-effect pops up that tells us something is wrong.

It could be that we are experiencing leakage in a relationship with a friend. We realize that something is wrong. The friend seems to be avoiding you. Maybe you have even tried a temporary fix like I did with my shower, trying to address the issue without creating a problem, yet you realize something is still wrong. More drastic measures need to be taken for a satisfactory resolution is reached. You need to face the issue head on and ask your friend directly about what is wrong, and how the relationship can be repaired to its original closeness and openness.

Leakage may happen in one’s spiritual life. Sometimes we get lazy in our walk with God. We allow sinful habits to creep in. If we recognize something is wrong, it may already mean it is time for some drastic measures. We can gradually allow others to influence us in directions that are not good and honorable. There are times we need to assess our friendship with Jesus and determine new patterns and habits to address the leakage. It may be beneficial to start practicing a few spiritual disciplines to get us back on track. Depending on the situation, we may want to find a friend or small group to help hold us accountable to the corrections we make.

An organization, a team, a church may all experience leakage of vision and purpose. Over time, the organization, including the leadership team, can forget what their vision is all about. Team members begin to do things that no longer match up with the values and vision agreed to at first. Sometimes a little adjustment of a reminder may be all that is required. Other times, a more drastic measure may be needed. It may require a full day of “re-visioning” with your team, returning to or reviving the vision that you all adopted in the beginning.

Leakage is often not noticeable until the issue is big, because leakage happens gradually over time. Once noticed, it must be addressed.

Leakage can be addressed with a few steps. First, like with my shower, you may recognize something happening that does not line up with the original purpose of the shower. I had no intention of growing mushrooms in my bathroom. Something was wrong.

Second, if a simple fix doesn’t cure the problem, drastic measures may be needed. I had to tear the whole shower out. You may need to address the issue head on.

Third, make sure you get a clear picture of what the problem is so you can then address it correctly.

And, fourth, do the difficult and time consuming work or correcting the problem. You will be glad you did.

Leakage causes damage. Don’t ignore the signs when you see them and address them appropriately as soon as you can.

|Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

A Grateful Heart

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When parents are raising their children, they teach them how to be polite and how to live into the culture around them. One of the values parents often try to instill into their children is to say thanks. Parents often remind their children to, “Say thank you.” Or they ask the child, “What do you say?” They want the child to express their gratefulness when they receive something.

Luke 17 tells us a story of ten men sick with leprosy who met Jesus. They stood at a distance, respectful of Jesus who did not have the disease, and called out for Jesus to have pity on them. Jesus tells them to go show themselves to the priest.  As they went to do so, they were cleansed. (The Old Testament Law said the priest was the only one who could declare a person clean after a sickness.)

We might applaud the faith of these ten in going to do what Jesus said even though they were not cleansed yet. They were only healed as they headed to find the priest. But they were healed!

Here comes the important part of the story. Yes, they were healed, but what did they do after that? We are told that one of the men who had just been healed, instead of continuing to the priest, turned around, came back, praised God with a loud voice, threw himself at Jesus’ feet, and thanked him. Ten were healed; one came to thank the healer.

 Jesus responded, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?” Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.” (Luke 17: 17-19)

How many times have we completely forgotten to give thanks, enjoying God’s goodness to us as if we deserved it?

We have a special day in our year that we stop to say “thanks.” Thanksgiving is coming up shortly. While it is good to have one day a year to give thanks, we need to cultivate a grateful heart and to develop an attitude of gratitude. As Paul encourages us in Ephesians 5:20, “always giving thanks to God the Father for everything.” Can we learn to give thanks regularly and not just on special occasions?

God is good to us in many ways every day. We take so much for granted, that we need reminders to pause and give thanks. If one wants a grateful heart, it means being intentional in giving thanks. Include thanksgiving in your prayers. Give thanks with your family around the dinner table. Thank God for His goodness in your life. Thank God for the unusual things and the answers to prayer. But also thank God for the things we receive from Him every day. The air we breathe, the food we eat, water to drink. Thank Him for creation we can enjoy. Autumne in my part of the world is a beautiful experience as the leaves change color and start to drop from the trees. Notice God’s beauty around you and give thanks.

Every time we give thanks, we remind ourselves that we depend on God for many things in our life. It is a reminder to us that we need God, and we benefit greatly from the good gifts He gives us!

Thanksgiving is coming soon, but don’t wait for that special day to give thanks!

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

The Benefits of Rituals

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It’s fall, and children are heading back to school. Though we have no school age children in our house anymore, I’m reminded of those hectic school mornings. Often it is a race against time to get the children dressed, fed, and backpack loaded to get them out off to school on time. This is an example where rituals could be of great benefit.

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ritual /rĭch′oo͞-əl/

noun

  1. A ceremony in which the actions and wording follow a prescribed form and order.

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Rituals are helpful patterns for life. These are steps we go through on a regular basis that ensure we don’t forget something and get it done on time. Rituals could help children be less rushed in the morning before they head off to school. Check out the examples below.

Before going to bed the night before:

  • Lay out the next day’s clothes.
  • Pack the backpack with everything except the lunch.
  • Pack the lunch and place in the fridge.

Morning rituals:

  • Pack lunch in backpack before breakfast.
  • Place backpack beside your shoes at the door.
  • Breakfast at the same time every morning.

It may be helpful to have a ritual for the start of your workday as a pastor or church leader. Instead of showing up in your office with no idea what the day will look like, you can have a plan to start the day right. A ritual can help you make the most the first part of your day.

To set up helpful rituals you need to think through what you already do, deciding which things happen every day and could help you start the day right. A morning ritual may look like this:

  • Begin with prayer, asking God to guide your day.
  • Check emails and quickly decide which to respond to or which to put on your to-do list to deal with later.
  • Plan your day, and note appointments already schedule or deadlines that need to be met.

You may find it helpful to have some “end of day” rituals which prepare you for a good start the next day:

  • List anything that needs to be followed up from the day.
  • Make your to-do list for the next day.
  • Note appointments that have already been made.

For rituals to be helpful, they need to be personal to you. They need to be steps you will take.

Rituals can help in many areas of our work life. I have rituals for how I go about preparing my weekly sermons. I have rituals I follow in preparing to teach a class. I have rituals in how I ensure I am ready for Sunday morning. These rituals help me to make sure I don’t forget something and save time because I don’t have to think up new patterns every time.

A few benefits of rituals are that you are less likely to forget important steps, you will be more organized, and life will be just a little less hectic. Enjoy establishing meaningful rituals.

Keep looking up,

Andy Wiebe

Book Reviews: Andy’s 2024 Reading Experience

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I will be sharing a brief review of every book I read this year. Hope you enjoy and hope it encourages you to keep reading.

B.L.E.S.S.: 5 Everyday Ways to Love Your Neighbor and Change the World – by Dave Ferguson and Jon Ferguson

As Christians, we know that Jesus commanded us to share the
gospel with the world around us. Yet for many of us this is a confusing and
terrifying thought. It seems so foreign to us. Dave and Jon make it seem simple
and lay out a clear plan on how to naturally share God’s love with the people
we encounter every day. If you were looking for a plan on how to tell others
about Jesus, B.L.E.S.S. is that plan. Begin with Prayer, Listen, Eat together,
Serve, and Share your Story. I encourage you to grab a book, read it, and apply
– by yourself or with a group.



 



Summer Road Signs Series – #4: Merge Signs

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I noticed a driver sitting at an intersection, treating a merge lane like a stop sign. There was an open lane in front of her, but she was stopped, waiting for the traffic to end. She did not seem to understand that the lane she was about to enter was wide open. It was only as she entered the lane that she would be able to accelerate to the traffic speed and merge over into the lane she was hoping to get into. And at times I have done the same thing. I know I should merge but hesitate because it seems like there is no room, especially if I have not driven that road before.

Merge signs generally indicate two roads or lanes joining into one. Two common places these signs are used is at intersections where they assist in free flow turning and, on the highway, where a multiple lane highway narrows to one less lane. These signs alert drivers to cooperate and allow those in the lane that is ending to enter their lane.

There are two roles for drivers when encountering a merge sign that reminds me of two experiences in life.

ONE: Merging from one lane into the other

      Some of us are cautious drivers. We do not want to force our way into traffic. It seems too dangerous to use the merge lane when others are going by at the speed limit – or faster. An introvert can relate.

      This is how introverts often feel in life. Merging into new situations brings fear of the unknown. They do not want to force themselves into new situation or new relationships. It seems dangerous. The others already all know each other. Will they welcome me? It is tempting to not even try new situations or to get to know new people. What if it doesn’t work out well?

      If we are caught in a merge lane in life and are hesitating to move over into the main flow of traffic, we need to recognize that the merge lane eventually ends, and with it, your opportunity to make friends with that person or try that new experience. Sometimes, as we hesitate, life moves on by. Do not be too afraid to try something new. And if it doesn’t work out, try something else.  Push yourself to continue to learn and grow. It doesn’t matter whether we are introverts or extroverts, we need to develop perseverance to keep trying new things and looking for new friendships.

      TWO: Allowing others to merge into my lane

      I am not naturally a courteous driver – just ask my wife. I have to work at reminding myself to allow others into my lane and not just push ahead with no consideration for others.

      Some of us need to learn how to consider the needs of others and allow them to merge into our lane. This applies to more than smooth and safe traffic. This applies to life as well. We need to be aware of those around us who are having a hard time fitting in. It may be at church, or at work, or even in our neighbourhood. We need to open our circles to others who need a place to connect.

      Sometimes we get frustrated with people who are not aware or understanding of what we try to do as leaders. Slow adopters annoy us because we have a plan and want people to follow us at our pace. It may be that there needs to be space and time given for those who are still figuring out how to merge into your lane. Leadership requires clear communication of vision and patience for people to get it and move into pursuing it. Let’s learn to make room for others.

      We need to make sure we do not treat merge signs as stop signs but slowly and steadily move into the traffic flow. We can ask God to give us determination to push ahead when we are scared, and ask God to give us patience for those who are slow to merge in.

      Keep looking up,

      Andy Wiebe

      Book Reviews: Andy’s 2024 Reading Experience

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      I will be sharing a brief review of every book I read this year. Hope you enjoy and hope it encourages you to keep reading.

      HOPECASTING: Finding, Keeping and Sharing the Things Unseen – by Mark Oestreicher

      As the title states, the book is about hope. Mark Oestreicher defines hope as: “Hope is faithful confidence that God continues to author a story that moves us from vision to action.” (p. 24) His belief is that hope is not something we work hard to get, but we can only have it as God gives it to us as we spend time with him. He describes a number of enemies of hope, each a distraction that takes our eyes off of hope to other things. I like how he shows that our role is to be Hope carriers to the world around us, already giving them a glimpse of the kingdom of heaven.

      Are you in need of some hope? This is the book for you.

      Responding To An Audience That Doesn’t Like Your Sermon

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      What do you do when you receive negative feedback on a sermon?

      First, do not feel personally attacked. It may be that the sermon was clear and accurate to scripture but the hearer didn’t like what God’s Word was saying. When I hear a negative reaction to a sermon – or to even decisions I make – I ask myself some questions to clarify the situation. Was I at fault? Or is the negative reaction in response to scripture says?

      Is it true and accurate to scripture?

      As preachers of God’s word, we need to be careful to say what scripture says. We need to be careful that we don’t misrepresent what God is says or misuse scripture to make it say what we want it to say. This means doing good research and study to ensure you are clear on what scripture says.

      Did I present it correctly?

      As we preach what scripture says, we also need to make sure we present this truth correctly. This could be ensuring we do not omit sections or aspects of scripture that we disagree with or do not like. We also need to remind ourselves that all of scripture speaks into the sermon of the day. Is there another side to the issue? Are there other scriptures that give a fuller view? Is there another scripture that needs to be referenced in order to give a complete picture of what is taught?

      Did I explain the situation it was addressing?

      There are times when it is helpful to give the background to the context of the scripture we are preaching on. It can help the listener first understand the message correctly, and secondly, figure out how to apply it to his or her own situations correctly. The historical background can give some meaning to why the author is addressing what he is addressing.

      Was I wrong?

      I ask myself this question sometimes because I want to make sure that I did not say something that was wrong or even hurtful. Yes, I need to present scripture accurately in a sermon, but I can choose what I say about it, or how I say it. If I did say something wrong, then I need to admit it. If I misrepresented God’s Word then I need to correct it.

      Is a follow-up or clarification needed?

      One sermon I preached brought a lot of response from the church members. Some who responded to me were thankful that I had said what I said. The sermon clarified something that they had been wondering about. The same sermon also brought responses from some who were pushing back against what I said. They did not like how I had interpreted what the verses said. Others were wondering how what I said fit with the rest of scripture. I began to realize, from both the negative and positive responses, that this was a topic that needed some more clarification. I decided to use the next Sunday to spend more time on the same scripture and the same topic, digging in a little deeper to explain how this fit with the rest of scripture and how I had come up with the interpretation and application of the verses that I did.

      I was serving this church as a Transition Pastor, so it was a great opportunity to remind the church that their next Lead Pastor may occasionally teach something they disagree with and understand scripture differently than what each member personally thought. I tried to use this situation to encourage the church that their new pastor would likely have different opinions on some things and that was okay.

      As preachers, we will occasionally say things that our audience doesn’t like. If their push back is against what God’s Word says, then it is an issue between them and God. If it is about something I said, then I need to make sure I was saying what was correct, and if not, apologize and correct myself.

      Preaching God’s Word is a privilege. We want to handle it correctly.

      Keep looking up,

      Andy Wiebe

      The Privilege of Being a Pastor #3: Making Disciples of Jesus.

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      One of the unique opportunities of a pastor is to walk with people as they take significant steps in their journey with Jesus. It is humbling to think that God allows me to be part of these times when people are making decisions that will impact their eternity. Let me share a few stories.

      I remember a teenage girl who was searching for answers. She came from a difficult home situation and loved the acceptance she was experiencing in the youth group and church. Her friend brought her to me and together we introduced her to Jesus! She knew there was something better than what she was experiencing at home.

      One young man had gone through many hard things. You could tell, just by looking at him, that life had been hard on him. I got to know him and tried to help answer his questions until the day that he asked to be baptised. Just as we headed to the washrooms to change for the baptism, he pulled out a cigar and handed it to me. What a fitting gift! He was so excited about what was about to happen and wanted to celebrate it with a gift for me.

      I love the excitement of those preparing for baptism. One teenage girl was determined we would have an outdoor baptism in the river near the church even though it was fall already. The special day arrived, and there was already a skiff of snow on the ground, but she was not backing down. We made sure to have plenty of extra towels to wrap up after and went down into the cold river for the baptism. It was one of the quickest baptisms I ever did!

      I remember reading the Bible with a new friend. He didn’t know the Bible but wanted to just read it together. This was not a Bible Study or in-depth lesson. We just started by taking turns reading in the Gospels. As we read the stories of Jesus, we stopped when he had a question or clarification was needed, and then kept going. I loved seeing his responses to a story that I was so used to but was brand new for him!

      I have preached many sermons in my life. There are many I have forgotten, but others stick in my mind because of how people responded. One Sunday, I preached on receiving the Holy Spirit from the book of Acts. I pointed out that sometimes people had leaders lay their hands on them and pray for them to receive the Holy Spirit. I made it clear that there was nothing special about me, but if there were any who wanted to have me lay hands on them and pray for them, to come on up as I closed. One man actually ran to the front! Then others started coming up. There were so many  people who wanted to receive more of the Holy Spirit, that I had to recruit a couple of elders to lay hands on and pray for people with me. What a joy to see people respond to God’s word!

      Working on vision with church leaders is one of the things I get excited about as I serve as a Transitional Pastor. I love seeing leaders begin to hear God together and get a sense of how God is leading their church. I served one church where leaders put in two planning and dreaming sessions of five and six hours each, working together to hear from God on His direction for the church. It was amazing to watch as they listened and heard from God together, coming up with the right words to describe who the church was and where the leaders felt God calling them as a church. The time of prayer and listening and discussing together brought a clear sense of direction that guided the church moving forward. What a privilege to coach the leaders through this process of listening to God.

      Walking with people as they make decisions to follow and honour Jesus has given me opportunities to develop some great friendships. One friend and I spent many hours together in the church and serving in the community and just doing life together. It was a joy to eventually baptise him as he said yes to Jesus. Another friend was struggling with a desire to be holy and feeling he was far from it. As we walked through this time together, not only was I able to encourage him to continue to follow Jesus and go deeper with him, I also found a great friend.

      I hope these stories show you what a gift it is to walk with people as they make big spiritual decisions and take steps in spiritual growth.

      Keep looking up,

      Andy Wiebe

      Fruitful Leadership #9: Self-control

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      We conclude our look at fruitful leadership with the fruit of the Spirit called “self-control.” Galatians 5: 22-23 gives us a list of nine fruits that should be evident in every believer. As a Christian leader, these fruits should be portrayed in the leadership of our church or organization.

      Self-control is about mastering one’s self, controling one’s self. It could be used to mean self-mastery, or self-restraint.

      When someone is overwhelmed and expressing their emotions, whether in anger or in sadness, we might say, “get ahold of yourself.” Someone who does not know how to control their anger may be describes as “flying off the handle.” These phrases describe the need for the person to gain some control over themselves. Self-control is needed when our emotions take over and we act in ways that we would not if our intellect was in charge.

      People who give in to addictions are described as lacking self-control. They seem to be controlled by outside forces that make them act in ways that they themselves say they do not want to act. Others may say they just couldn’t control themselves. They are lacking self-control.

      It is interesting to find this characteristic in a list of spiritual fruit. Self-control implies that each person needs to take personal responsibility for their actions and master their body. Yet, when we understand the fruit of the Spirit, we recognize that each of these fruits are evident in one who has given up control to God. It is God’s Spirit, working in and through a believer, who enables them to have these spiritual fruits. So, self-control begins by letting go of control of ourselves and handing the reigns of our life over to God.

      Self-control is more about giving God control than about willing ourselves to gain the strength to overpower our emotions and desires. Yes, we need self-control in our lives. Good leaders will be self-controlled. But that self-control only becomes stronger as you trust in God more.

      Leaders need self-control when in a situation where they are tempted to get angry at a team member or someone they serve. As we ask God to help us gain control over our anger, we trust him to help us.

      Leaders need self-control when they are tempted to take shortcuts. These might be ethical shortcuts when a leaders is tempted to do something wrong because it is easier. These shortcuts will damage your integrity. Self-control, under God’s control, will help leaders remember that sinful and harmful shortcuts will only hurt them and their organization in the long run.

      Christian leaders need self-control when they attempt to go ahead of God or beyond what God has asked of them. Our ultimate goal as a Christian is to honor and obey God, not to build the biggest organization at the fastest pace or make the most money or grow the largest church. Those things may happen, but we need to check in with God regularly, looking to him for what is next for us and the people we serve. Business solutions may work and may be good, but make sure that you check in with God about his plans for your first.

      We need to display self-control as we lead, and with God’s help we can.

      Keep looking up,

      Andy Wiebe